S.W.I.L.F.

I just learned a new word to add to my dying recuperating vocabulary:

S.W.I.L.F = Strange women I’d like to fuck


Think Condoleezza Rice in bed. I know she’s not really that strange but you get the picture. Or maybe Miriam Defensor Santiago. I wonder if that bitter ball of hate will turn into a self-licking pussycat if you give her enough oysters to eat (oyster is a good source of aphrodisiac). Or someone really strange but bangable like Angelina Jolie or Rose McGowan. And hey, Anne Robinson can figure out the weakest link in all your sexual fantasies!

And then I have my S.M.I.L.F, which would be a noticeably longer list. They're just so... enticing, in a smelling your armpits kind of way.


I better stop thinking about stuff like this before I get a boner! haha.

No, I'm not wildly disordered. I just happen to be a member of the male species. :P

GT Peeps: Ang Alamat Ni Vibura

Syempre I made commotion na naman sa office kasi I don’t know who Vibura is. Here’s the unedited transcript ng mga messages. Mga fans ng Darna, mag-eenjoy kayo!

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Troy: U so got it pare...u know kasi nga the pasosyal comment of this guy dito sa blog pare you know, mga bobo daw ang mga tao sa col center, you know, esp. dito daw sa PS...at inapi pa lahat and inidentify lahat kung pano malalaman if u're working in a col center u know, pare...so jologs daw...e you know, baka may natamaang nerve u know, pare like shit, as in TAE...fuck that!!!

Wina: Troy, db ikaw ung gumawa ng blog? hehehe..

Troy: hahahahhaahahahhaha.....di no....potek....ang arte nga nun eh...pasasabugin daw nya ang malate sa Nov.1...so hintayin natin...nyeta...

Wina: hahhaha.. THE! pasabugin ko ilong nya.. the nerd.. waahhaha

Troy: may nakilala kong ganun dati...galit na galit sya sa mga taong nagtatrabaho sa col ctr...

Chris: hay nako..........gusto nyo maggawa ako ng group blog para satin? hahahaha!

Corinne: ay magandang ideya yan. gawa ka christian and we can lambast, to our heart's content, PS and the ugly people that work in it (di tayo kasama dun, magaganda tayo e)

Troy: AGREE AKO DYAN!!! TAYO LANG NMAN NAGPAPAGANDA DITO EH!!!

Jiz: sino ang kakambal ni shrek?

Corinne: hulaan niyo, look around. sino ba dito ang kamukha ni shrek? haha. di na kelangan ng ibang clue

Troy:sino yun si Princess Fiona??? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! E Si VIVORA??? KIlala mo

Wina: oo no kila2 ko un.. db un ung ahas ni valentina sa Darna.. ung ke nanette medved...

Troy: oo sya nga!!! nasan b si Darna ng matiris yung ahas na yun? pakalat-kalat e!!! HAHHAHAHAH

Corinne: ahaha. si vivora. naku, bubulwak na ang mga halimaw galing sa banga

Wina: d ko mali2mutan ung nguso ni vivora.. sobrang kissable... hehhee

Corinne: so alam na naming lahat kung sino ang first kiss mo. hahaha

Wina: hehehe.. c xtian d mkrelate kung cno c vivora.. wahhaha

Corinne: haha. natawa ako dito. how can you not know vivora. napakanimated pa naman ng nilalang na yun. kaaliw. wahahaha.

Chris: sino sya?huhuhuhu.Pakidrawing nga troy!!!!

Troy: christian, kanina ko pa hinahanap si vivora e, wlang pic...basta hahanapin ko...email ko agad kapag nakita ko na

Wina: wla ngang pic.. hinanap ko rin knina e.. hehehe.. effort tlga.. hehehe

Troy: e kasi naman....nakaktawa sya...di nya kilala so di nya mapicture si vivora db??? pati si Jiz...ano ba? di tuloy nila malaman kung sino ang vivora d2!!!LOL

Corinne: nakakatawa magsalita yun tapos napisat ata siya nung naglaban laban na. haha

Jiz: hahaha, siya nga yun.wahahaha

Corinne: natatawa ako kasi yung kaklase ko nung high school na makapal ang bunganga, tinutukso na BIBURAK!!!!!!!!!!

Jiz: siya yung nakalunok ng bato ni darna once diba, at naging darna siya.hahaha

Chris: ay shet parang I remember na that scene! yeah, sha yung naging darna na snake!! voiced yata sya ni ruby rodriguez?????

Jiz: siya nga yun xtian. :)

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Ayan, nadagdagan na naman ang jologs knowledge ko hehe.

So based dyan sa mga mababait na batang yan:

Vibura: sometimes referred to as Vivora. Isa syang ahas na sidekick ni Valentina sa Darna, yung si Nanette Medved ang bida. Siya yung viper snake na makapal at kissable red lips. Voiced sya ni Ruby Rodriguez. Minsan nakain nya ang bato ni Darna at naging Darna din sya, sosyal!!!! Pero nung naglaban-laban na sila, napisak sya. So sad. R.I.P. Vibura.

Peace!!!

PS: Kung sino makakapagprovide ng picture ni Vibura, may prize!!!

Kaya Huwag Papalibre sa Date!

Naniningil kasi ng bill sa dinner after malaman na wala nang second date. So lesson ito, wag na lang tayo papalibre kahit feeling generous sya. At magsend ng e-mail sa kanya:

Dear xxxxxx,

I just received your e-mails and also your message from last night. I was away and am just getting back this morning. I had every intention of calling you and meeting to go out, but your email has completely turned me off and I find it extremely tacky. I will not be sending you any money since I offered that night to pay and you told me no, that you would take care of it. Please do not call me or send me another e-mail, I would rather not hear from you at all. And for future reference in the dating world, you may want to rethink the tacky approach about asking someone for money like that, perhaps that is why you haven't met anyone or have seen them again.

________________

At pag nangulit pa rin. Magsend ng mas mahabang e-mail:

Dear xxxxxx,

I am truly sorry it didn't work out. You seemed like a nice person, but after your voice mails, you have now entered the world of a first-class creep. Dating is not business. I offered to go dutch at the time the bill came and you declined, as far as I am concerned, that is the end of the story. I didn't know that your paying the bill was contingent on me going out with you again.

Once again, I think you need to look internally as to why things are not working out for you in the dating world. You had mentioned that you had been burned several times, and I am sorry if you feel that it has happened to you again, but perhaps it is your approach in dealing with others that leads to this. Dating and relationships and business are completely different and there is not a quid pro quo for eating and drinking on a date. If this is how you think it works, perhaps you should consult a professional, who I could take care of all of your needs. If I remember correctly, it was your choice to go out for dinner. I would have been just as happy to take a walk in the park to get to know you.

With that said, please feel free to call my employer or issue a summons if you think that this will help. Your message has said that you will not drop this, and I am not one to be bullied or threatened. I have saved all your messages, and if you choose to go ahead with your threats, then I will be more than happy to notify the proper authorities and get a restraining order. I will also let your clients and employees know about your erratic and bizarre behavior.

________________

Nakakaasar talaga. Kaya nga lumabas para malibre eh! Wahehehe. Joke lang.