Ugly.

Somebody once suggested to me that being single should be a positive thing. I've tried to look it from every possible angle and every which way I see, the only positive thing I can find is that I don't have to put my emotional trust and confidence in someone, and that's not hardly a possitive enough point.

I sat yesterday at home thinking about why I'm ending up single. I know why I am. Too goofie, too ugly, too shy, too confident, too tough, too scary, too forward, too dumb, too clueless, too protective, too laid back, too undescribed, too difficult, too easy to get along with, too funny, too sweet, too hopeless romantic, too me. I'm too me, but it's not as if I can change that. I keep telling myself, just when your not looking (which I have been doing for like ever!) someone will come and sweep me off my feet. Not a chance! I see this single thing being the only thing people can describe me as. "There goes that single guy", that type of thing. I don't ever recall someone believing I am their perfect match. I've never had that. And sometimes, I think I'll never have that. Don't get me wrong, I'm not on some major downer AGAIN, if you ever get the pleasure of meeting me, you'll think im a crazy loon! Maybe that's it? Maybe the fact that I don't give a shit gives men/women the heebie geebies.

Listen up, I'm here, come get me, a big heart and warm soul here, thank you very much!

But seriously, hoping someone will love me. And I mean serious, matured and faith-based kind of love, not the "I love you but a gazillion things are more important than you, so just sit there, behave, and I'll come back when I'm free" kind of love. Sigh.

And yes, I'm too ugly, maybe that's it. =(

PS: Now, don't post comments pertaining to looks and appearances, as the title might instigate. This is not intended to be a "superficial" post.